Salutations and Greetings Wonderful People

It has been ages since I have sat down in front of my sticker-bombed laptop to just blog. That blows. That is why I have taken it up once again. So, while Parks and Recreation idly plays in the background I will attempt to pump out a few interesting things.

Last Friday I began talking to my delightful English teacher. We got into a discussion about Elton John, then the Grateful Dead. He ended our conversation with a little abnormal homework assignment. Monday I was to come in with the answer to one of life's most baffling questions- what is the greatest album of all time? 

WHERE THE F#*K DO I START? Nearly every CD, download, and vinyl album I've owned flashed through my head. After a weekend of deliberation and debate with my boyfriend we narrowed it down to American Beauty by the Grateful Dead and Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band by the Beatles. Me being a Beatles girl, my final answer is Sgt. Pepper! What is not to love about the album. The most noticeable is the incredibly creative cover featuring famous icons. This album as well as Revolver is when the Beatles could truly mature as artists, not just entertainers. The Beatles began experimenting with sound and editing and recording. What a better time than 1967 for getting a little weird. Everything is groovy down to the fact that Ringo, normally not quite the center of attention, is introduced as the band leader "Billy Shears". The fab four essentially made their own fantasy land that even sucked in their listeners. So ladies and gentleman- THE BEATLES!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWZGqAAqDi8

A moment of happiness for the awesome-sauce things that have happened recently

Okay let's take a second to talk about the election. Who else is completely psyched out of their mind that they didn't have to hand over their lady parts to an old man who looks like he's pooing in nearly every debate? I sure am. I wasn't necessarily raised a democrat but I sure as hell turned out as one. And by the time I was old enough to understand politics my sister in law over at Stupid Stork made it clear that she would disown me if I was a Republican. That sealed the deal. 

Googles homepage for the day. Happy 165th Birthday Bram Stoker!

I re-fell in love with my Dr.martens. I'm not sure if anyone can relate, but I really do not like shoe shopping. My Dr.Martens are the best thing that has happened to my feet. Although I got some blisters at first, now they're comfy as can be. An added bonus, I feel like I could drop kick Arnold Schwarzenegger if he dared to look at me funny. It's a pretty badass feeling. 

Up until this year I felt a little odd like something was missing from my day. It has been fulfilled. This year my school added a film class. This possibly could be the greatest thing my school has ever done, in my opinion. I am a complete film nerd. Even though not everyone else is as filmy (yes- I just made that up and I doubt it's a real word) in that class, I get to see some people transform into film nerds. I've met fucking stellar people in that room and watched movies that were the fucking bomb.com. 

It has occurred to me that I do not know a single person who doesn't like photography or at least looking at photos. Voilà! http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohmyalimarie/

Now go ape shit.

This is Lucky, she's my dog. And yes, for Halloween I shoved her into a banana costume.

Anywhooooo I hope good things are happening to everyone else in the internet world too!

Let's play the 'guess who's going to murder someone in 3..2..1..' game

I'll make this easy, it's me. I am going to just chop someone's head clean off. This is due to a horrible feeling. I'm not talking about just any feeling, oh no. I am talking about the forsaken feeling when just a stranger not holding the door for you makes you want to curb stomp them. When your phone keeps freezing and inexplicably starts calling people just to make sure you fit at least one awkward conversation into your day. When your friend who is 6 inches away from you will not stop snoring, despite the fact that you're trying to blog, so you start debating the best ways to suffocate her. Yes, these are all personal problems, but I think that you guys can relate. 

Anything and everything is getting on my last nerve. It's not PMS, it's not me just being a bitchy teenager, it's just a stressful day. I am preeetty sure that all benevolent forces that could exist have thrown in the towel and said 'fuck you'. 

Alas, I have a cure to my dilemma: watching a good movie whilst eating my weight in kettle corn.

A list of my potential soul mates and future lovers (in no specific order)

• Seth Rogen- We literally have the same fucked sense of humor.
• Jason Segel- Again with the humor thing.
• Paul Rudd- He's funny. He's cute. What more could you want?
• Will Ferrell- One word. Anchorman. 
• Jonah Hill- Funny funny funny.
• Joseph Gordon-Levitt- Nothing so gorgeous has ever blessed my eyes before.
• George Harrison- He makes the music, he has a killer haircut, and he plays the sitar. It's love.
• Jim Morrison- He is just oozing sex appeal, has a heavenly voice, and I would just love to drop acid with this man.  
• Michael Cera- Awkward+blonde+tall
• Charlie Chaplin- I go apeshit for that mustache. 
• Jared Leto- Over this summer I discovered that he is in many of my favorite movies (Requiem For A Dream, Panic Room, Fight Club, American Psycho)
• Cassandra- My best friend since Mrs.Duvall's 1st grade class.
• Charles- He's the super sexy barista at Starbucks. 
• Jim Carrey- He stole my heart in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 
• The entire cast of American Beauty- self explanatory. Special shout out to Wes Bentley for making every guy at my high school seem uninteresting and shallow.
• Zooey Deschanel- Her bangs just make me melt. 
• Charlie from The Perks of Being a Wallflower- lets face it, he's just awesome and misunderstood. 
• Jimi Hendrix- I would love to kiss the sky with him. 
• Anakin Skywalker- Unf. 
• Link from Legend of Zelda- It's just something about a blue eyed blonde kid trying to save a princess.
• Legolas from Lord of the Rings- I have a thing for archers. Orlando Bloom has never been sexier. 

Salutations and Greetings

Hello internet world, welcome to my blog. I will be your tour guide. Please keep all hands and feet inside the vehicle. Do not be afraid, I am just a teenager and I only bite 60% of the time. 

I probably should start off by letting you know what you're getting yourself into. Well, my amazeballs sister-in-law prompted me to make a blog. So here I am, on my laptop (also referred to as the love of my life), attempting to write about who I am and what goes through my sometimes psychotic mind. Please bear with me while I deal with my dreary Maryland high school and parents who simply don't get me. Here's a list of things that you should know about me:

• I don't like the majority of the people I know.
• I can be considered odd. 
• I like coffee and the occasional cigarette. In that order. 
• I am German, among other things.
• As dazzling as it seems to be a normal teenage girl, that's just not me. 
• I love my dog. Her name is Lucky. If you fuck with her I will shank you without batting an eyelash. 
• I am a film nerd. Say you'll watch American Beauty with me and my pants will be off before you can say 'Alan Ball'. 
• I am an aspiring photographer. This is my Flickr. http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohmyalimarie
• I am in grade 11, but I feel like I should have attended high school in the 90's.
• Recently, I parted ways with an asshole who I called my boyfriend for a year and a half. One of my best decisions.
• Like I mentioned earlier, bring me coffee and you can be my best friend. At least until I finish the cup. 
• Fact. I have one of the most complicated Starbucks drink orders. Every time I order the barista bursts into flames. 
• I like art. I like seeing it. I like being around it. I like making it. 
• Never show up unexpectedly at my home, more than likely I am in underwear and socks. It's a sight that only Lucky and I get to see. 
• One might describe my personality as..hmm..hostile.
• I prefer isolation. I will cut off a leg just so my parents will let me stay home alone for the weekend.

That is all you need to know about me, for now. If we're similar let's make a hippie circle and light incense. If not, maybe I can convert you to my unorthodox ways.